Quarantine Day 3: The Prodigal Daughter

We have recently (before quarantine) been letting our girls go outside and play in the neighborhood with the other kids. It's great for their independence, self esteem, physical development, social decelopment, etc.

In Ukraine (and definitely in our neighborhood) the kids are not usually let out without a parent hovering over them. But we feel that it is best for our girls to feel trusted by us, to have some responsibility, and to experience some freedom and autonomy. Of course, we gave them the ground rules including where they could and could not go, some social etiquette, dressing requirements, etc.

They have both been doing so well! Of course we have challenges, like having to teach our kids not to leave their scooters in front of cars … Oops. Or not playing with other kids' toys without asking.

But the lesson that our little Rowan learned today had our hearts racing. Here's what happened.

We had let her go outside after lunchtime to play. At first, we heard the scooter across the brick path, the screams and shreiks of going a little too fast, and the random stories that she tells herself.

But the sound soon stopped.

When all went quiet, my heart sank. Our neighborhood is very safe and I wasn't really worried about other people. But when, after going down the street and yelling her name, she did not respond - I was terrified.

Steven, Amelia, and myself quickly banded together in search of our Rowan.

3 minutes.

5 minutes.

7 minutes.

No answer, no child. Silence.

I was struggling to hold it together as Amelia asked, “Mom, are you scared”.

“I am”, I said.

And just when the first tear was about to roll down my cheek, a little being in a white jacket came around the corner from OUTSIDE the territory.

As soon as she saw us, her head went down, and her pace slowed before coming to a stop.

I ran to her, bent down to her level, scooped her into my arms and asked her where she had been.

“I was helping our neighbor pick up the toys from the sand, she said.

Just then, one of our neighbors rounded the corner with her son and baby. She informed me that Rowan was simply helping them and she was grateful.

The mama bear in me wanted to scold her and ask her why she would take a child out of the territory without informing their parents, but I simply told her about our worries and asked her to be in communication with us, ensuring that we always know where our child is. She was very understanding and agreed.

Our sweet little Rowan could feel the tension and she began to profusely apologize and cry. I swept her up and told her that I wasn't mad at her and that she is not in trouble. But I let her know that we were worried and we searched for her. I asked her to please let us know if she is going to go somewhere, especially outside of the territory (and that to go out of the territory, she would need one of us).

Her response was humbling.

She understood immediately that she was being pursued, that she was loved and wanted, that she has value, that she is not irreplaceable. She could not contain her smile, it went ear to ear! Her arms shot up and she jumped into mine. I held her and kissed her and told her I love her. She then leaned torward Papa, but instead of letting me go, she pulled us all in together for a family hug (Amelia too).

And thay’s how our day went.

Day three.